Woodland

For those who do not know, I have a cemetery fetish.  Yeah, I know a lot of people think it's morbid.  It's not like that though.  It does stem in part from an interest in death.  For me, there are a lot of things in life that I have never done, and sometimes when I go to do something for the first time, I get really nervous, simply because it's unknown.  I think about death a lot like that. It's not really a scary thing in and of itself.  The thing that makes it scary is that it's unknown- we've never tried it before, or if we have, we're not around to share with others what it is like. I don't mean to diminish the terrible sadness that can accompany the death of someone who was close to us.  I am not suggesting that it is an easy thing to deal with or think about.  I just think it has a much less scary and actually quite beautiful side.  I have had some deeply personal experiences that confirm that conviction.

I also love how we as humans try to find some way to pay tribute to the life that deceased persons lived by memorializing them in stone.  Many cemeteries contain very unique headstones and monuments.  I am sure a lot of thought went into some of those as the people left behind tried to find some expression of the importance of the person who passed on.  The different symbols and such are really fascinating.  I also like to look at the name and the date on the stone.  There is a person you often know nothing about.  It's fun to try and imagine who they were, what they were like, what they went through, what things happened in the years they were alive- I know I am probably way off the mark most the time when I do that, but it's still fun.

Now when I say I love cemeteries, I am not talking the boring, often newer (but not always) ones that just look like a big green lawn on first sight because nearly all the headstones are set in the ground (good for mowing, I know).  They're alright, but not the stuff of my fetish.

This is the Provo cemetery... boring (like most of Provo, ha ha)

I'm talking cemeteries like this Jewish cemetery somewhere in Europe (that really narrows it down, eh).  Too cool.

So I am happy that we have moved very near the Woodland cemetery.  It is just gorgeous with a large variety of headstones, and also an old house that's been sitting there for a couple hundred years.  I went running there yesterday.  I saw headstones shaped like crosses, groups of siblings and spouses buried together, some very large headstones, angels, people born a long time ago, and so many other things.  I found the grave of a man who died in the Civil War next to his wife who died almost 40 years later.  Love it.  I gotta go running there some more, because there is a lot to explore.  It's pretty big.  In fact, I got a little nervous for a while there that I might not be able to find my way back out.  Anyway, here's a little picture for your enjoyment.  I just got it off the internet.  I'll have to go and take some pictures of my own for a cooler view.  So next time you go cemetery exploring, invite me.

Photo highlights

Things are really coming together for us finally.  It's actually only been a week since we moved, but it feels like it's been a long one.  We have internet in our apartment- yay!- and I got some pictures onto my computer so here are some highlights of the past little bit.

We moved out of our old apartment

into our new one (not yet clean enough to be photographed- but getting there).  It was quite the day.  I had to go to class in the afternoon, so we didn't get started until I was home, and that meant we went late into the night, but we got all our junk over here.  

We visited Bartrum's Gardens, which is a historic site out a little southwest of us.  It's a botanical garden that some guy made in the 1700s.  His house is still there too... very beautiful. We highly recommend a visit.

We went to Gettysburg, and did one of those CD tours of the battlefield, supplemented by lots of getting out and exploring.  I love this view down onto Devil's Den from Little Round Top. 

I had been to the battlefield before with my family, but Zack had never been, and we had a blast despite that we had just moved the day before we left, and we were both pretty tired.  There's also a picture looking toward the Pennsylvania monument, 

 a picture at the cemetery.  

And finally, Zack got some blood drawn this week.  He is so bruised.  This picture does not begin to do it justice.  Looks awfully painful.  Poor thing!

We have had a fun couple weeks (besides the bruise).

Tonight will be the maiden voyage of our dishwasher.  I am so excited.  I just hope it works.  I know there are people out there cooking for and cleaning up after more than 2 people, sometimes many more, and they don't have a dishwasher.  You people have great treasures waiting for you in heaven.

Yes LaChelle, I saw your tag, but I seriously don't have a book handy.  We still don't have internet in our new apartment so I'm at a cafe using it.  I'll get to it soon.

As for our move, we have cleared the floor in the front room, thanks in large part to an enormous bookcase that we bought from a guy around the corner.  We went to the store yesterday and spent way too much time gasping about how much curtains cost.  Wish I could sew.  I failed a quiz today due to the chaos of the past little bit.  No, this isn't one of my little whinings about how I failed when I actually got a B instead of an A.  This was a real-life bona fide F.  In fact, it was 15% below the cut off for an F.  I can count the number of those I've gotten in my life on one hand.  Come to think of it, I can probably count them on 1 finger (or maybe not... I'm not really sure), so it was kinda sad, but I'm surprisingly hardly beating myself up over it.  I feel somewhat justified, and the quiz doesn't actually carry that much weight.  I hope the final in a couple weeks goes much better.

We had a blast at Gettysburg this past weekend.  I don't have pictures yet but I put some up soon.  Life will be much less complicated once we get the internet kinks worked out.

Practically our whole ward is moving in the next couple of weeks.  You guys are great.  We'll miss you.

I know this post has been all over the place.  May everyone enjoy such a scattered life for a few days so they can better appreciate the blessing that is order and routine. 

We survived

Phew!  As of 1:45 AM this morning, we got all of our stuff moved to our new apartment. It's pretty chaotic right now.  We can't pick up the dresser we bought until Monday so clothes are everywhere.  We also only have 1 small bookshelf, which situation we will have to remedy as we have about a bzillion books strewn about.  It will probably be a couple weeks before we're in all the way, but we got there.

I have to say that we are absolutely thrilled to be in our new apartment.  Yet, despite all my sobbings about it over the past little bit, it really was sad to leave the old apartment.  That was our first apartment together as marrieds- sentimental.  It slowly lost all its character as we pulled down our picture frames, took our lovely wrapping paper decoration off the bedroom wall (visible in this picture), and tore the electrical tape that we were using as decoration off the kitchen cabinets.

Yes, it's probably tacky to decorate with wrapping paper and electrical tape, but limited resources call for creativity, and we liked the end product- it had a certain quirky charm to it.  As it all came down, that apartment seemed to transform back into just another insignificant room.  It seems true that an apartment (or house, or whatever) is only as good as we make it- physically, yes, but also as good as the memories that we make there.  So I guess we have a year to make our new apartment that much better than the last one (with the help of a dishwasher, of course).

I could not go any further without taking a minute to thank those who offered to help with the move.  We appreciate your kindness.  We also had some people express to us that they were not able to be there to help us, but that they would have helped if they could, and that they were thinking of us.  We also appreciate those people for taking the time to care about little ol' us.

And finally, for any interested parties, we do have a tv stand, a coffee table, and a couple of full length mirrors that we're looking to dump off... oh, and a coffee maker (the old renters left it.  I promise I haven't taken up coffee drinking).  I know this isn't Craig's list but I just wanted to open the option up for people we know first before we give it to strangers.  Let me know if you wanna come look at them or whatever.

Chaos fast approaching

Ok, it's official.  We are moving this week.  Painters are coming in tomorrow to paint the new apartment, and then we're free to move in after that.  It looks like Thursday is going to be the day based on our schedules for the week.

It's going to be an insane week.  There is so much on my plate, I don't even know where to start. I was thinking to myself that the whole moving thing wouldn't be so tough because we don't really have a lot of stuff.  But when I found out we were moving so soon, I sat down and started thinking of a plan of action, and I realized that we do have a lot of stuff.  Okay, so this is nothing compared to moving a whole family or anything.  It's just 2 of us moving from one small apartment to another.  Still crazy though.  I am most overwhelmed about the kitchen.  Oh well. By week's end, it should all be over at the other place- probably scattered all over oblivion in boxes and such, but over there nevertheless.  Besides moving, I have school and the ever growing workload associated with that (especially as the end of the term is fast approaching), a talk to write for church, a large project for Primary, and we're going to Gettysburg this weekend.  I see people who juggle much more than I do, so I know I'm just being a wimp.  I admire people who can do that though.  I feel like I'm going crazy and I haven't even started the week yet.

So, if you happen to decide to stop by this week, please forgive me if my apartment looks like a tornado blew through.  Just ignore that my hair is all over the place and I don't have a speck of make up on my face.  And if you don't stop by this week, consider yourself a lucky soul for having the chance to avoid the complete chaos that is going to be mine (this week, and probably for several after).

Wish us luck.  

Overcoming life's "foleys"

I was 18 years old, in my first semester of college, and each day after school, I would attend CNA course for 5 hours.  I was headed for nursing school (this was before I changed my major, as outlined in way too much detail in a previous post), and I was excited to learn how to be a CNA.  Several days worth of classes went by without incident until one day when we watched a movie on how to insert a catheter.  At this point, I had never bathed anyone.  I had never changed a brief.  I had never watched a movie full of such private things.  I was absolutely mortified.  During my dinner break, I went out to my car, drove to a nearby park, parked the car, and just cried.  I decided I did not want to be a CNA after all.  Of course I talked myself into going back to class and finished without incident.  Then I went to work as a CNA.  During my time doing that work, there were many firsts, lots of which were uncomfortable or embarrassing.  I remember giving my first shower in a CNA clinical, and the aide helping me was a boy.  I was standing there in the bathroom with a naked old lady and a boy about my age, and I just felt so awkward.  There are dozens of other such situations.  But none was as mortifying to me as that video.

I am now 22.  I have worked as a CNA for about 4 or so years.  I have overcome many of those feelings of apprehension, embarrassment, and awkwardness in such situations.  I knew when I started nursing school that I would have to learn how to do a catheter, nevertheless I dreaded it, remembering that CNA class those years ago.  I knew in my mind that it wouldn't really be as bad as I thought it would be when I watched that movie.  I have come a long way since then, and I hope I would be more mature about it in general, regardless of my CNA experience.  Still, it seemed like a major hurdle to me- a fear that I have not confronted since that day.  I have felt apprehensive, wondering what I would really think and feel when I finally confronted that situation again.

Today, it happened.  

I went to lab, and we learned how to do catheters.  We watched an instructor demonstrate, then we got to practice.  I won't say that I did it perfectly or anything (give me a break, it was my first try) and it will probably take a lot of practice to master the skill, but it went well.  I felt so much more comfortable than I thought I would.  Granted, we were only practicing on dummies, not real people, but I know that when the time comes for me to do this for real, I am going to be okay.  Now I feel relieved.  After all this time, I learned that I truly have made great strides in this area.  And I have to say that looking at my progression thus far is encouraging.  It reminds me that I will probably see things as a nursing student and as a new nurse that I am uncomfortable with.  I will be in awkward situations.  I will be confronted with situations and think there is no way I can do that thing. But I can.  A few years down the road, I will look back and realize that the thing that I feared, the thing that I doubted myself on has become comfortable, or at least not terrifying.  Sometimes, things in life just take practice, and time. Sometimes, you just gotta let the tears run out in that parking lot, then wipe your face and go back to CNA class.  Sometimes, it is only by experience that you can learn what you needed to learn, and progress.

And that's what I learned from a catheter.

    

Happy Birthday Zack

I have been partying with my husband this weekend, since it is his birthday on Sunday. 

It seems to be a tradition of sorts for people to post something nice about he or she whose birthday it is/will soon be.  Although I feel some qualms about being all trendy, I think I will follow suit on this one and spit out some random things that I think are so awesome and/or adorable about Zack.

- He cooks for us just about every single day, if not more than once a day.  I can not cook and I do not like to cook.  On occasion, I make something.  It usually doesn't turn out.  Zack is a fabulous cook though.  How many girls snag a husband who cooks every night?  I got really lucky there.

- Zack has a talent for expressing himself.  He is very articulate, and is also a great writer.  

- He has a pen fetish.  He is on a quest to find the world's most amazing pen.

- When I am in a bad mood, he reminds me that we're moving in a month to an adorable little apartment that we carefully picked out.  He starts outlining the amenities we'll enjoy while we're there, and before I know it, I have forgotten all about whatever was upsetting me.  He has this idea in his head that he has no ability to cheer me up when I'm grouchy because sometimes I am stubborn and refuse to be cheered up, but he is really the thing that brightens my day and my life the most (aw, how cheesy).

- He introduces me to movies and shows that I probably would have never watched, and I end up loving them.  Right now, we're on season 2 of an X-files marathon.  Good times.  I also introduce him to movies he never would have watched because they are really dumb.  He watches them with me anyway because he loves me.

- He is probably the hardest worker I know.  He goes to school full time and has tons of homework.  He has a very time-consuming church calling, he writes for the school paper, plays in the band, and works.  Then, as before mentioned, he comes home every night and cooks for us, and treats me like I've had the hardest, most tiring day ever.  I end up sitting on my butt like a spoiled little princess while my husband does everything.  

- He does a really great impression of a camel.

- When he studies or works at his computer, he always chews on stuff.  It's really cute.  He will have the pen he's holding in his mouth, or he'll pull the lid of a highlighter using his teeth.  He doesn't even realize he's doing it because he's so busy thinking about something else.

- He has a talent for brushing his teeth for a really long time.  When I brush my teeth, I have to stand at the sink and spit every so often.  Otherwise, I feel like my mouth is filling with foam and such and I am going to suffocate.  He can sit on the couch and work on something or watch TV and just brush away.  On and on he goes, never running for the sink gasping for air as I would in a similar situation.  

- He is the best husband in the entire world.  I've never met anyone so great.  I am the luckiest chick on the planet.  He'll be mad at me for posting the camel picture and for writing some of this stuff.  Maybe I can make some amends by saying I love you Zack.  Happy birthday.

Isn't he cute?